Jamais Vu

또 져버린 것 같아
넌 화가 나 보여
아른대는 game over, over, over

만약 게임이라면
또 load하면 되겠지만
I guess I gotta deal with this, deal with this
Real world

Ay, uh
차라리 게임이면 좋겠지
너무 아프니까
I need to heal my medic
But I'm another star
완벽하지 못했던 나를 탓해
Brake in my head, brake in my step, always
그저 잘하고 싶었고
웃게 해주고 싶었는데

Please give me a remedy
멈춰버린 심장을 뛰게 할 remedy
이제 어떻게 해야 해
날 살려줘 다시 기회를 줘
Please give me a

A remedy, a melody
오직 내게만 남겨질 그 memory
이쯤에서 그만하면
꺼버리면 모든 게 다 편해질까

괜찮지만 괜찮지 않아
익숙하다고 혼잣말했지만
늘 처음인 것처럼 아파

부족한 gamer, 맞아 날 control 못하지
계속 아파 'cause 시행착오와 오만 가지
내 노래 가사, 몸짓 하나
말 한마디 다 내 미시감에 무서워지고
또 늘 도망가려 해
But 잡네, 그래도 네가
내 그림자는 커져가도 내 삶과 넌 equal sign
So 내 remedy는 your remedy

Please give me a remedy
멈춰버린 심장을 뛰게 할 remedy
이제 어떻게 해야 해
날 살려줘 다시 기회를 줘
Please give me a

또 다시 뛰고, 또 넘어지고
(Honestly)
수없이 반복된대도
난 또 뛸 거라고

So give me a remedy
멈춰버린 심장을 뛰게 할 remedy
이제 어떻게 해야 해
날 살려줘 다시 기회를 줘

Please give me a remedy (성공인가, 돌아왔어)
멈춰버린 심장을 뛰게 할 remedy (집중해서 꼭 네게 닿고 말겠어 떨어지고, 넘어지고)
이제 어떻게 해야 해 (익숙한 아픔이 똑같이 날 덮쳐)
날 살려줘 (이번에도 쉽지 않아)
다시 기회를 줘 (관둘 거냐고? No, no never)

English Translation:

I think I lost again
You look like you're mad
In a blur, game over over over

If this was a game
I could load it again
I guess I gotta deal with this, deal with this
Real world

It'd be better if it was a game
Because it hurts so much
I need to heal my medic
But I'm another star
Blame me because I'm imperfect
Brake in my head, brake in my step, always
All I wanted was to do well
I wanted to make you smile... damn

Please give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance
Please give me a

A remedy, a melody
A memory that's left behind just for me
If I stop right now
If I just turn it off, will everything will be more comfortable?

I'm OK but I'm not OK
I told myself I was used to it
It always hurts like it's the first time

Not a good gamer, that's right, you can't control me
I keep hurting 'cause of my repeated mistakes and 50 thousand other things
My song lyrics, each gesture
Every word become afraid of my jamais vu
Again, I try to escape
But still, you grab me
My shadow becomes bigger
My life and you, equal sign
So my remedy is your remedy

Please give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance
Please give me a

(Remedy)
Running again, stumble again
(Honestly)
Even if it repeats endlessly
I'll keep running

So give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance

Please give me a remedy
(Is this success? I've returned)
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
(I'll concentrate on reaching you no matter what, falling, stumbling)
What should I do now?
(This familiar pain crashes over me again)
Save me
(It's not easy this time either)
Please give me another chance
(Will I give up? No, no never)
I won't give up

🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀

The song which I can relate without knowing the translation, I previously have read the translation and not really understand what this song actually means, but now, when I read again.. this masterpiece is telling how I feel to the entire world. 

I think I lost again
You look like you're mad
In a blur, game over over over

---> I feel this everytime I have to present case and answer my lecturers questions, I end up feeling lost, they look angry, dissappointed and dissatisfied... it's game over. I was humiliated. It was a game over during that time and the over, over, over.. tell the world that it happened too many times.

If this was a game
I could load it again

--->  If this is game, I can reload the situation again and do the correct way that won't humiliate or hurt myself. But, this is life, it cannot be reload. 

I guess I gotta deal with this, deal with this
Real world

---> there is nothing I can do, the series of failure cannot be undone.. what is there other than just following the flow of my life.

It'd be better if it was a game
Because it hurts so much
I need to heal my medic
But I'm another star

---> Yes, it hurts so much.. if this is all a game.. I can heal the medic for my character, but I'm not a star in the game, I'm a star in real world.

Blame me because I'm imperfect
Brake in my head, brake in my step, always
All I wanted was to do well
I wanted to make you smile... damn

---> They blame me for my imperfections, I blame myself as well, there's too many breaks in my thinking, in my actions. Yes, what I want was to do well, be the best, make you satisfied with me, happy with me, not dissappointed with me. However, I seemed to always cause you frowning, in the pathway to make you smile. How hurt it is to me everytime this happened.

Please give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance
Please give me a

A remedy, a melody
A memory that's left behind just for me
If I stop right now
If I just turn it off, will everything will be more comfortable?

---> In my previous entries, you will know how much I pray for healing, how clueless I am to live my life now, how I want to stop right now, and wonder at the same time. This really hit home.

I'm OK but I'm not OK
I told myself I was used to it
It always hurts like it's the first time

---> This is where I understand the Jamais Vu. The lyrics explained everything too well that I do not need to explain more. 

Not a good gamer, that's right, you can't control me
I keep hurting 'cause of my repeated mistakes and 50 thousand other things
My song lyrics, each gesture
Every word become afraid of my jamais vu
Again, I try to escape
But still, you grab me
My shadow becomes bigger
My life and you, equal sign
So my remedy is your remedy

---> I am not a good student in this field, yes, I can't do well as you think so, I keep on hurting by my repeated mistakes, every part of myself becomes terrified of having to experience the jamais vu again.. 

I try to escape the situation, but they keep on coming.. 

My dark fear getting bigger, 

My life is all about you.. 

So, my remedy is when you find content in me..

Please give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance
Please give me a

(Remedy)
Running again, stumble again
(Honestly)
Even if it repeats endlessly
I'll keep running

So give me a remedy
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
What should I do now
Please save me, give me another chance

Please give me a remedy
(Is this success? I've returned)
A remedy that will make my heart beat again
(I'll concentrate on reaching you no matter what, falling, stumbling)
What should I do now?
(This familiar pain crashes over me again)
Save me
(It's not easy this time either)
Please give me another chance
(Will I give up? No, no never)

I won't give up

---> This is what I find fascinating with this song..

after acknowledging how I feel in the first place.. they are showing me the positive attitude out of all the sufferings, which is not to give up. They know how hurt it is to face the jamais vu... what they do was pleading for second time and not give it up.. at the same time of searching the remedy to not be hurt by jamais vu.